Halo 4
, intense super happy RPG ballsack bleeds, no online, no co op, the ability to have sex with Marines and you play as AIDS.]] Halo 4 was a lot like a Brute whose IQ is over -40, it was not known if it existed or if it even would. Noobs have wrecked their brain trying to find an ISO for Halo 4 on the internet, but hope had finally reached them at E3 2011 when 343 announced Halo 4, saying that it would release when the sun rises in the west and sets in the east, when the seas run dry and the mountains blow away in 2012. Too bad we all died back then. If you think 2012 was going to be the end of the world then you should kill yourself. Overview The game consists of happy RPG battles that are so intense shitty that your balls will bleed. You use your special attacks by yelling into the microphone "FUCK ME NOW BITCH!" It also involves masturbating to Cortana 8 times (5 of them are Hardcore) and having sex with Marines. You play as Huge killer sperm balls for the co-op of the game, when you aren't killer STDS, you play as the Chief, who recently got a job as a gangster, and apperently doesn't do the previously listed objectives. He hangs out with his homies, like Grunts, the Arbiter and other Spartans. With Chief, you get to rape/fuck women (like Miranda and Cortana), have rap battles, tape videos of you showing of your dicks, search up porn on the internet, rob banks, steal stuff from shops, kill members of enemy gangs, blow up shit, troll on 4chan, prank noobs, participate in Warthog street racing (you get to customize you Warthog to your heart's content), Kill cops (A new alien race), speak of the worst swear words (including the one that starts with "N", yes I mean "Noodles"), hang out with your gang, go to strip clubs, go to pimp hangouts, smoke ciggarettes, drink alchohol, smoke weed, take drugs such as cocaine and heroine, compete in Mongoose burnouts and kill Jackholes to eat for dinner. If your console is connected to the internet, you can access Gruntipedia. There is also a moral choice system. Yeah, it's rated F because ESRB killed themselves before they got to play as the Chief. Uncle Dolan was also rumored to be on the design team, which was proven true when he gave this speech at E3: The game will be exclusively for the PS3 and will utilize the SuperUltraReal3D engine. The first DLC will include a mission where you massacre Fox News (but Bill O'Riely makes it out and turns into Starscream, setting up a boss fight where you get to shoot him down while he attacks you with Fat Kids that have Aids) and a moral choice system. And you can make grunst actually exist with them. Criticism PROS: *You get to play as the Chief! *You get to teabag! *You get to customize your Warthog! *Chief is a gangster! *You get to eat Arby! *You get to kill Jackholes! *You get to hang out with homies! *You get to rape/fuck women! check your privellige! *You get to have rap battles! *You get to search up SEXXAY PR0NZ!!!1111 *You get to rob banks! *You get to steal stuff from shops! *You get to have gangwars! *You get to kill Assbags! *You get to blow up shit! *You get to prank noobs! *You get to participate in Warthog street races! *You get badass armour! *You get to compete on Mongoose burnouts! *You get to swear hardcore! *You get to troll hardcore! *You get to drink alchohol and smoke everything! *You get to smoke 40s and drink weed! *You get to huff Thee Pi Lourdd's ashes! *You get to go to pimp clubs and strip clubs! *You get to start sentences with the same thing! *If you have an internet connection, you can access Gruntipedia! *you get your own Slurpee Machine. *You have bottled Gruntiness *many weapons from previous halo games are returning as well as new ones(the DMR, the ROCKET PISTOL, and the PMS Inducer) *You get to DUAL WEILD SHIT! *You get to EDIT GRUNTIPEDIA! There are cons?: *Why would you want to have 8 masturbation sessions to Cortana? (If you are a noob, this should be a positive) *Fucked RPG battles that make your balls bleed? OH SHIT *No LAN play (WTF) *To replace LAN play, it has a free 99999999999999999999999999999$ gift card redeemable at your local weed seller (not a negative, just an uneccesary compensation since all of us already smoke weed all the time, am I right?) *On co-op you have to fuck Marines and play as the Flood! *Why does Chief have to troll 4Chan? *Why does he also tape videos of him showing off his dick's'? *The only copy without Dee Ar Em is permanently lodged in the Prophet of Eye Cancer's rectum. (Wait, isnt that a pro?) *If you attempt to acess Gruntipedia while playing as AIDS, you are only allowed to vandalize it. *Rap battles cuntrolled by throwing money at the screen *Who gives a fuck about the cons YOU CAN MAKE GRUNTS ACTUALLY EXIST! *You can no longer fuckwankgayrape the Noobiter WARNING There is an imposter version of Halo 4 going around, said to have been released on the Xbox 360 on November 6th 2012. It's actually the codename for a project made by Halopedia which will end Gruntipedia forever. In order to stop it, you must follow the instructions given on this page. Hahahaha Halo 5 will come out on November 10th 2002424242424242424 and will replace Chief with Spartan-11Penis Gameplay videos Category:Shit people complain about Category:Halo 3 Legendary Ending Category:Douchebags Category:Mythical Beings Category:Things you shouldn't use for intercourse Category:Things that kick ass